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Sunday, June 13, 2004

Too Many Victims, Not Enough Hoes

I was just thinking today, and I just realized that the world has too many victims. I'm wondering, in fact, where are all the fucking victimizers out there that are able to create so many victims. I mean, by the number of people out there claiming to be victims, you'd think that every major alley, workplace, school and bathroom has some big black guy named Tiny lurking in the shadows, or a white middle-aged pedophile in a so-friendly-that-its-creepy clown suite and let's not forget those Asian gangsters (ex: AZN boyz). Now I'm not saying the Tinys and clowns of the world aren't out there, because they are ... somewhere in Compton or Fullerton I suspect. The fact is though, that most "victims" out there aren't genuine victims, but in fact are victimizers.

"How?" you ask.

Well, I'll tell you. These so-called "victims" victimize us normal Joes (or Big J's in this case) with self pitty. They feel the need to tell you there whole life story and how their 10th birthday wasn't exactly perfect and that's why they're sooooo fucked up today. Boo Hoo. I am, in fact, so fed up with these victimizers in disguise, that I have come up with responses that you can use instead of having to listen to their bullshit:

Boyfriend dumped you?
Suck a dick.

Girls don't you like?
Suck a dick.

You don't feel like you fit in?
Suck a dick.

Parent's don't understand you?
Suck a dick.

People don't like you, friends not around?
Suck a motherfucking dick, asshole.

Don't like it?
Do something about it, fuckers.

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